Beyond the Mirror
Welcome to Beyond the Mirror’s website
If there is to be peace in the world there must be peace in the home.
Violence in the home is everyone’s problem.
Each of us must be part of the solution.
We must do all that we can in the time that we have.
This site provides:
- A free e-book of poetry on psychological abuse; (click on book cover below)
- Information on unhealthy/abusive relationships;
- How we can help as individuals and as communities.
Our mission is to work for peace in homes by distributing information about unhealthy/violent relationships; suggesting ways to help individuals in such relationships; and empowering and affirming victim/survivors.
Spiritual Support
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Following are suggestions—actions that
may be helpful. Give these suggested
interventions thoughtful consideration.
- It is helpful to recognize that many individuals in abusive relationships use their faith to seek support and courage in troubled times.
- Victim/survivors may benefit from statements that address their safety, well-being and empowerment from a spiritual perspective.
- Some faith communities employ staff who understand violent relationships and are qualified to help.
- Avoid giving messages derived from spiritual beliefs, tenets, or principles that may skew the intent of those principles and be harmful to the
victim/survivor; e.g., “God never gives more than a person can handle” or “Why don’t you pray that you can improve so you are a better partner.”
- It can be helpful also to say "A loving God does not want anyone to be hurt."
- Be with the victim/survivor in her or his suffering and healing. Give her or him time to talk and listen carefully. Acknowledge feelings you have in regard
to her or his safety and the pain you feel as you hear the stories.
- Affirm the victim’s/survivor's faith, regardless where that person is at any point.
- Praise and support the victim/survivor as she or he moves toward wholeness.
- Offer to pray with and for the victim/survivor.
Considerations: if the victim/survivor feels she or he must forgive the abuser
Actions that may be helpful
- Respectfully suggest that if the abuse is ongoing, the abuser has not accepted responsibility for the abuse.
- There are times when the victim/survivor may need to forgive in order to heal, but it may be more helpful to address that later.
- Say, “I know and care about both of you, but I cannot condone violent behavior towards you.”
- To forgive does not mean to forget.
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